I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
NoShamevember. You game?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Randomize
