Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
