I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I need to calm my uterus...
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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