Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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