I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
