what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
