I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
