they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
