Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
