How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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