Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
