Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
