So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
