Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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