I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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