oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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