in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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