i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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