Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
