Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
