if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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