Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
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