if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just googled if crying burns calories
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
