On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
