What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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