Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
