did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
