check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize