I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
my poor anus
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize