i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
