I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
