Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We need to rekindle our bromance
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
