It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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