Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
