Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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