New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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