Grow some girl-balls and come out already
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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