He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize