I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize