Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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