Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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