Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I am spending my child support on dildos
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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