do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
