the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
i've created a new STD.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize
