i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I have already put on my inside pants.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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