It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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