I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
