She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
