haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
