Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
